By: John Hutchins, Quantix Vice President, Client Services
Unemployment in the IT industry, according to some estimates, is below 2%. It is truly a candidate’s market. If you have halfway decent technical skills and a reasonably good personality, you should be able to find a job. Just because it’s easy to find a technical position, however, doesn’t mean you can get away with murder during the interview. You still need to take it seriously, do your homework, be professional and play the game. Otherwise, you may find yourself as one of the unemployed 2%.
Over the years, I’ve participated in thousands of candidate interviews, both internally and at client sites. If your goal (tongue in cheek) is to lose the opportunity, here are some tried and true ways to bomb the interview:
- Don’t bathe for a few days before the interview.
- Show up to the interview drunk.
- Allow your ear hair to grow an inch long and comb it back so it looks really professional.
- Wear a Hawaiian shirt and sandals.
- Tell the interviewer that you’re not really interested in THIS opportunity, but have applied for many other positions with the company and wanted to find out why you never received a reply.
- Arrive to the interview a day late.
- When asked what you would do when faced with a server crash, tell the interviewers you would start by slugging a shot of scotch.
- When asked at the end of the interview if you have any questions, ask if you can get a leather day timer once you start.
- Show up smelling strongly of cigarettes.
- Tell the interviewer that you were fired from your last job for looking at porn on the Web.
- Bad mouth your previous employers – every single one.
- Explain to the interviewer that the salary they posted is $30,000 too low for you, but you figured they would pay you what you’re asking for once they met you.
- Tell the interviewer that they have terrible communication skills and that they are an idiot.
- Tuck your dress shirt into your underwear and let your pants droop down so everyone can see.
By the way, I’m not making this stuff up! These are just a few real life interview stories I’ve had the pleasure of witnessing. If you set your mind to it, you too can completely bomb an interview.